Things I May or May Not Have Said

“With your looks, your personality should be beaming.”

“I’m ready for my blankie and my baba.”

“Rolling your eyes is NOT an acceptable form of arguing.”

“I hope someone gets eaten by a shark soon.”

"The department of homeland security is making a mockery of the starfleet alert system!"

“My desire to take advantage of this situation is overwhelming.”

“This feels like a test.”

“I miss my pants.”

“Just do your thing. You know, skank it up a bit.”

“Keep your standards highs and your expectations low.”

“I am immune to charm. At least, that’s the official party line.”

"Here in Canada we have a special program to deal with the homeless. It's called 'winter.'"

"We have enough youth. What we need is a fountain of smart."

"I used to feel bad about pirating music, then I watched MTV's Cribs."

"I just need to hit someone."

"Man, you just pushed the geek meter right off the scale with the combined MS bash and LOTR reference."

"I want them to commit seppuki when they lose on Iron Chef."

"You know you're a geek when you run your webcam software to see what you look like instead of going to the bathroom mirror."

"They are my family and I love them. That's why I can't part with them for less than $20."

"Clearly FFX-2 is not a game I'll be able to play with my pants on."

"A alphabetically be in organized sentence should words."

"Intelligence is alcohol soluble."

"Are you sure you like boys?"

"You look a lot different with your clothes on."

"Name six animals which live specifically in the Arctic."
"Two polar bears and three four seals."

"I use AOL because it's free."
"So is gum stuck to chairs."

"There are two theories when it comes to arguing with women. Neither one works."

While discussing Smokey the Bear commercials:
"If an anthromorphic bear in a pair of jeans and one of those ranger hats comes up and tells me not to set stuff on fire, I probably already did".

"Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver."

"I don't like you. And if I met your mom I probably wouldn't like her either."

"When you pull the pin from Mr. Grenade, he is no longer your friend."

"I love my new computer. More than my girlfriend."